There are not many other types of people who infuriate others and have them losing their temper more than the know it all. They can make us feel inadequate and powerless and so we react badly, confirming their power over us. However, if you remain calm and think a little bit, you can learn how to deal with people who think they know everything.
Why Do They Do It?
Anger Management
You will be better able to deal with people who think they know everything if you try to look at it from their point of view. Very often, the know it all lacks self confidence so they feel they have to show off what they know and try to make everyone else feel inferior. Perhaps they were bullied as children and they are repeating old patterns? You may never actually uncover the reasons for the arrogant attitude but just by having the recognition that something made the person that way, you can increase your understanding and start to put the behaviour in perspective.
Reaffirm your own self-worth
It is not that you are inferior or know less than the other person. They just want you to feel like you do. They can only affect the way you feel about yourself if you let them. So, instead of accepting everything the know it all says, think of all the positive and good things you know you can do. You have self worth and no-one has the right to damage that.
Listen to the other person
Sometimes, a know it all attitude stems from a feeling of not being listened to. You can help to ease their fears in this direction by listening to what they have to say openly and without comment. That way, they will see you as less of a threat to you and will probably relax on feeling they have to act so arrogantly.
Show you accept them and like some of their ideas and they will feel validated.
When you have made the know it all feel more confident and comfortable, you can start to change some of their attitudes. However, you must do this subtly. If you directly challenge them or are aggressive, you will send them running right back to their old defensive behaviours of being the know it all.
Instead, mirror the person's view back to them. That way, you will show you listened to them and appreciated their ideas, and they will feel happy about that. From there, you can gently start to unpick the ideas and present information which refutes some of what they say. But instead rejecting or mocking their ideas, simply present the conflicting evidence. Then ask the know it all what their view of that is.
However, there will always be the know it all who refuses to change his or her opinion. In that case, having examined their view in the light of your own beliefs, you may just have to learn to shrug off their views. They are not harming you by thinking something different so you have no need to worry about it.
If the problem becomes too annoying for you, you could always stops seeing that know it all.
So, although it can be infuriating taking the time and energy for how to deal with people who think they know everything, you can limit the effect it has on you. Examine your own beliefs and make sure they are strong. That way, your self esteem can stand meeting up with these people. If you are sensitive and subtle, you may be able to get them to change their views but if you can't, you can walk away, knowing that you are happy with who you are.
How to Deal With People Who Think They Know Everything
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available for a limited time only at: communication skill tip
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